Connecticut requires all the usual info SSN/DOB/Address when setting up any checking accnt with an EIN. I don't know if it even matters to use a NM LLC in this situation, or just a plain old CT LLC. My accountant explained that the info Ct needs whether or one regeisters as a NM LLC or any other state LLC is fairly invasive.

Fortunately I'm moving next Summer. In the meantime here is what I intend to do:

Buy NM LLC. Open an account at a small bank here in CT. Use my real home address with the accountand EIN number docs, but have all mail sent to CMRA.

Create biz cards, letterhead and all biz collateral with CMRA address as return address, sans the # sign before the box number.

I do not have a ghost address yet, nor a nominee.

Is there anything else to do for the short term, which would protect privacy, or at least set me up for an easy dive off the grid when I move next summer?

Thanks - Joe

... I am not convinced you MUST form an LLC but since it is for a business purpose, I suggest you form the LLC in your own state. (Perhaps it can be owned by a NM LLC with an address in Alaska but check first with your accountant.)

There are so many lapses in logic with this plan that I truly don't understand the point. My eyes "cross" when I take my glasses off for photographs. I could easily put a hat on for public surveillance photos, add a wig, change my hairstyle, wear dark glasses, whatever..... And SMILING is my primary facial expression! If these photographs are meant to be matched up to facial recognition databases, then going by the parameters required, my photograph on my driver's license should NEVER come close to real life.

Does anybody here know the real purpose of "facial recognition" photos?

You can also buy SkypeIn numbers all over the world to receive calls.

If you use a prepaid visa card registered to a made up name/address to pay for it's pretty anonymous.

You could even use a VPN to hide your real IP from Skype.

Submitted Link #1: http://www.skype.com/allfeatures/subscriptions/#me...

This is a long post, one of the longest I've written in some time but I believe it's important for this mother to help another in a very painful situation help her son, herself and her other children. (It may also help other mothers BUT I don't want to turn this site into a parenting advice site.) I have been in a substantially similar situation with my son, my family and community and I navigated us both, successfully, through it. I did so based on a seemingly novel concept these days; one not mentioned by the well-meaning men here who are, by and large, right with their suggestions.

The concept? Even if this will be the first time you have, assert your parental/motherly authority with your 19-year-old son and kids! "Legal Adult" does NOT mean "grown man" in most cases. So, not only do with your other children what has been suggested, do the following with your 19-year-old. If you do, he can't focus on any negative behavior of yours but must face the one who stares back at him from a mirror as the one responsible for this situation he's about to be in.

Write a letter to your 19-year-old and send it to wherever you know he's staying or can pick up mail. (Call him only if you're compelled but this step is crucial and may preclude significant "mother guilt" later.) It's important you make some contact with him about this situation because he really is still a kid and, unfortunately, has like most teens do, lost his mind. He won't wouldn't, likely, recover it for several years, even without the drug use. In the letter, you need to remind him that you are the same mother he once loved and respected (even if that's not quite true). Give a few examples of good times, of times he trusted you and things turned out well (use the "remember when" tone, not "see, I told you so") and tell him you understand how hurt he was when you moved from California (not "how I hurt you") but you had to move and couldn't leave him there because you love him. Tell him that his reaction to that choice is painful and disturbing to you and you're having a hard time understanding it.

(Skip the "you're my baby" thing; it will completely undermine your authority because kids this age think that's weird and creepy. Also, don't lecture him and remember, he's a male; no pity party, "poor me", sentiment; NO accusations and keep your points short and to the point. Your entire letter should be 3/4 to one full page MAX.)

Then, say to him the following: "While I still love you and always will, it is not loving to allow you to behave criminally toward us or enable your drug use. That would be selfish of me because it would be based on my fear that you will reject me or because I feel guilty that you seem so enraged toward me my choice to move you here and then confront I you with your behavior instead of taking it on myself. It would be my trying to avoid dealings with those feelings. THAT is an injustice to us all and THAT I refuse to be selfish. I will no longer allow my misgivings or any unresolved guilt I have to be something that stands between you and your recovery. I will not give you that excuse to continue your behavior, either. That's my problem and the way you've chosen to respond is your responsibility. I know you can make different choices. Therefore, I will NOT tolerate this behavior (specify behavior--consider using bullet points since that works best with most males, especially teens) any longer. Until you (get counseling, go to rehab, get and stay sober, get work, go to Job Corps and get your GED and a trade, whatever), you will not be welcomed near or in our home, me or your younger siblings."

What you say next depends on where you are emotionally or psychologically or if the situation has gone too far. But, you MUST have the emotional courage to say the following: "Moreover, son (add name), if you do X again (state what X is, even if it's a list but stay FACTUAL, not accusatory), I promise you, for your own good and ours, I will do Y (state what Y is)." Make sure its press charges and insist on his arrest, get a T.R.O., peace order or some other legal action. If the situation has gone too far for you to allow him to do another thing, say: "Since you persist in doing X" (again, identify all of X), I've done Y" (and identify what Y is and actual have done it if you say you have). Again, make sure it's some form of LEGAL action because you MUST do this to protect yourself from an increasingly irrational and dangerous young man who happens to be your son--and protect the public from him, too.

Then, end with "I love you son but I hope (or pray if you're a person of faith) you won't force me to do whatever I must--within the law--to protect you from yourself but us from your conduct."

That last part gives you the 'right' to move away and not tell him where you are without telling him you're doing so. He also can't later come back and say he wasn't warned that you would do this because you said you would "do whatever I must", right?

THEN, and this is critical, you MUST follow up on your promises, Tiki. It won't be easy and WILL be painful but this is crucial not just for your 19-year-old but for YOU and your other children. They may even act out or angry toward you and others (presenting other issues you'll have to confront as directly) BUT they, ultimately, they will feel you protected them--but only if you stand your ground. (Get counseling support if you need to in order to do this. If you a person of faith, rely on that and get appropriate counseling, too, if necessary.) This will make you stronger and feel like a more capable mother and woman. If you are feeling apologetic, only apologize to your son or the other children that they FEEL hurt by your actions; NEVER apologize FOR your actions to ANYONE unless they are truly foul, selfish or unjust; these are right, appropriate and just. And only explain your decisions or actions if you choose to and ONLY to the members of your family and those friends who will understand. Tell everyone else nothing and, if necessary, MYOB!

NEXT, MOVE away, FAST and as far away as possible. Get some help from domestic violence programs, if necessary BUT insist on your how HTBI privacy practices. (For instance, you don't want your name, your kids names, etc. in some state social services database unless that's the only way you can get help.) DO NOT reveal your location to anyone who can't support you or to your 19-year-old whose spent six weeks in detox and rehab and swears he's changed. Tell him, "That's great, son! So which half-way house are you going to for continued treatment or recovery?" or "So have you considered Job Corps to get your GED and a trade?" DO NOT let him return until he's whole because he'll revert.

CUT OFF unsupportive family members and so-called friends like the gangrene they are on your life. Let them deal with your son if they believe his lies. They'll learn the truth real quick. Keep your private life PRIVATE; tell them little or nothing. Tell the other kids only what they need to know or insist they not violate your privacy rules. (That was a punishable offense n my family when I was growing up. Whatever happened to that 'rule of law'?)

Is all of this hard? Absolutely. I know. I compelled my son at around the same age to go to a program (though it wasn't for drugs, thankfully) and told him that he did not have the option of returning to live with me so he had better make it work. My family and some of my friends thought I was mean, unreasonable, selfish and evil but I warned them that there would be hell to pay if they intervened or bailed my son out. I told them not to mind my business for me or else. Everybody complied because they KNEW I meant it.

The reason they got it was because, on more than one occasion, when I've had to protect myself and my son from what I considered a very dysfunctional and unsafe birth family situation...when I was determined to break that cycle...I would cut my family off and/or move away. To this day, I live a fair distance from any of them--even my son. But, guess what? It worked and it still works. All of it.

Did change happen overnight? No way. For my son, it took several years. He got his act together. When he started to go sideways again recently (at age 23) due to normal struggles that young people have but exacerbated by the economic collapse, I intervened again, removed him from the situation and put him elsewhere, in a situation appropriate for him. He is, once again, happily thriving and moving toward his calling. Moreover, he grew up a LOT after I "redirected" him to other activities this summer to protect him from dysfunctional family. He feels better about himself than he ever has and knows where he belongs and who he is. A big bonus to that 'intervention' this summer? Our relationship, which had been so strained we had not spent time together for more than a few days, was restored when we spent weeks together recently. I would and will do any of this again if I must because my son trusts me because of what I have done and is aware of how it has benefited him.

And my birth family? Well, they've been transformed through my own inner-transformation work that occurred when I moved away from them and insisted they respect the 'new' me (which I attribute entirely to my faith). They have used my techniques with their own kids (or those I've suggested to them based on the particular child's personality and needs) and those kids are transformed. ALL of us are different people and our family is close in ways it's never been---at least in my immediate family. If my extended family decides they rather like the happier existence we now have and they want that, too, they're welcomed into our world. If not, they're not. Keep away; keep FAR away.

As to the blog idea, it's a good one but mostly for you because it may be cathartic BUT be careful because this can appear somewhat self-serving and backfire. Eventually, those who really care will learn the truth without your having to expose yourself or your private matter. Also, if you post ANYTHING that's not public information to disprove your son's accusations...even if strictly your opinion, HE could sue you for defamation, libel and invasion of privacy. Check out the link below for what the true legal definition of "invasion of privacy" under common law is (this is a simple explanation) and learn the other implications for bloggers under the law from sites like medialaw.org or poynter.org. Unless you're a fairly well-known, longtime journalist, even if only in your community, you can't assert "reporter's privilege". Some state laws prevent bloggers from being sued, in most cases, others do not. Learn what side of law you'd be on. Even redacted works that you point others to are associated with you and that's a privacy killer if you get sued. Also, remember, what you put on the internet STAYS on the internet, so, if your son gets his life together, this information may come back to harm him later. Make sure you're willing to deal with the consequences of that.

Finally, Tiki, you and I both know that, most of the time, being a mother is a thankless, arduous and painful job. But, if you "raise your child in the way they should go (that is, based on THEIR particular personality, not only YOUR goals for them), when they get old, they will not depart from it". However, your children will likely thank you if you do the right thing--which ain't always the easy thing--for them, regardless of naysayers and howling from your kids.

I wish you Godspeed in this situation. Been there (and back with my niece about 18 months ago) so I feel your pain. But, tough love WORKS, so get tough and be loving for your sake and that of your children. Keep in mind that others are watching and may take a page or three out of your book. Place that in the back of your mind and do what's right for YOUR family, not what may be right for someone else's.

Submitted Link #1: http://cyber.law.harvard.edu/privacy/Privacy_R2d_T...

But, the residency application process involves intense privacy-violating procedures. I will have to provide a police record (with fingerprints), health records (proof of no diseases), birth certificate, marriage certificate, proof of bank funds (letter from the bank or bank statement), etc... They also require a legitimate address to show that I have a home there (whether rented or owned is not important). So, how in the world is one to jump through all these hoops without ditching all privacy entirely?

If you would say it's not possible, then how does one live in an overseas country for years and years without going through this process?

... Skip the residency. Stay less than six months. Then cross into a neighboring country and come back (In some countries you can return in 24 hours.)

According to the Security Essentials software console and Microsoft SpyNet Wikipedia page (see attached link), "Computer information is sent (such as IP address, operating system, and Web browser), and personal information might be sent (such as search terms or data entered into forms), but will not be used to identify you or contact you."

Is any other "personal information" sent to them? Who knows... If you put a price on your privacy, in my opinion this product is not really free. Please use caution before taking advantage of this software.

Submitted Link #1: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microsoft_SpyNet...

1. Talk with a magistrate. Take whatever you can get at this point. The trick is to let the law document every infraction, every time and let it build. Given enough time he will trip up with the law in his own web of lies. “I also told them that sometime in the near future I would be driving away from the house; destination unknown to all.”

2. Children should be on a need to know basis from this point forward. Loose lips sink ships!

I'd start a diary with the past and start keep it up to date. Get the teacher you spoke with contact info etc. Be sure to take a phone book with you when you move. You may never need it but it could come in handy someday. The court system likes names, dates, costs and facts.

We have been investigated for operating a dump. While that one was short lived because they did not find any bags of trash or such piled everywhere, others involved child protective services and that one took awhile to clear up. They like to error on the side of caution.

When he was still in high school; he told his teacher he could not do his work because we did not have a computer at home. When I finally got a meeting with her, she told me that his not having computer access was affecting his grade. I then explained to her that he had access, he just didn't like the rules that came with it (computer stayed in dining room so I could glance in and make sure he was not somewhere he shouldn't be).

I sat down with all my family and explained to them what I learned from the lawyer. I also told them basically that we all needed to avoid him and ignore him. And anyone else who may ask "How I am doing" should be answered with a simple "fine" I would not trust anyone to know anything I am doing.

I also told them that sometime in the near future I would be driving away from the house; destination unknown to all.

I knowI could get a no trespassing order against him to not come on my property. But would I be able to get an actual restraininng order; because he is lieing about the family and trying to ruin our reputation? I do intend on letting anyone know, who asks about him, what he has done and that he should not be trusted to tell the whole truth.

Thank you all for your input. This situation has been hard to grasp and accept. Afterall, you raise a child and then they turn around and do these things to you.